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How to Know If You’re Stuck in a Road Rut and How to Get Out of It

Energy Habit #4 is DEVELOP – and we develop on the road in three ways –
1. Sharpen the Mind
2. Process the Thoughts
3. Monitor the Heart

Sharpen the Mind – is what we put in to sharpen us in multiple ways
Process the Thoughts – is getting out of our head all that we put in
Monitor the Heart – is keeping a pulse on how we’re REALLY doing

One of the best ways to sharpen the mind is to read content that teaches and challenges you to develop personally and professionally.

And one of the most influential books I’ve read in the past year was written by someone I’ve interviewed before and followed his writing, James Clear.

His book, Atomic Habits, was pivotal in curating and translating my habits in helping business travelers and is the foundation of the content in this episode. So, all the content kudos goes to James Clear.

There are seemingly no bigger creatures of habits than someone who works on the road: aka – a Road Warrior.

We’re the essence of creatures of habits. We have our way of doing our “road thing.”

Habits make or break your ability to become an Elite Road Warrior. The irony about our habits is that if we have good habits at home, we’ll most likely have good habits on the road.

But….

If you don’t have good habits at home, the road will absolutely expose you.

Now, I’m not talking about taking a business trip once a twice a year and it feels like vacation but when the road is your vocation.

If you eat lousy at home, few turn it around on the road.
If you don’t sleep well at home, you rarely sleep more or better on the road.
If you don’t workout at home, you rarely turn into a gym rat on the road.
And I can go on and on and on.

According to researchers at Duke University, habits account for about 40 percent of our behaviors on any given day. [1]

Here’s the goal or the win of this episode – to get you to think about your Road Habits and find out where exactly you’re in a Road Rut with your habits.

I’m a psychology nerd and have the degree to prove it but it’s important to understand the process of building a habit to start the Road Habits conversation.

A habit is a behavior that is repeated enough times to become automatic.

It can be divided into four simple steps:

1. Cue. A piece of information that suggests there’s a reward to be found, like the smell of a cookie or a dark room waiting to light up.
2. Craving. The motivation to change something to get the reward, like tasting the delicious cookie or being able to see.
3. Response. Whatever thought or action you need to take to get to the reward.
4. Reward. The satisfying feeling you get from the change, along with the lesson whether to do it again or not.

The cue is about noticing the reward.
The craving is about wanting the reward.
The response is about obtaining the reward.

If a behavior is not sufficient in any of the four stages, it will not become a habit or automatic.

In summary, the CUE triggers a CRAVING, which motivates a RESPONSE, which provides a REWARD, which satisfies the craving, and, ultimately, becomes associated with the cue.

This is key: All behavior is driven by the desire to solve a problem.

Sometimes the problem is that you notice something good and you want to obtain it. Sometimes the problem is that you are experiencing pain and you want to relieve it.

Either way, the purpose of every habit is to solve the problems you face.

So, let’s get practical.

Many of my road habits are to relieve stress and make life on the road easier – not necessarily better.

  • I order what I want that I either can’t get at home, not willing to pay for on my own, or eat because it’s front of me.
  • I don’t drink on weeknights at home but I almost always do on the road.
  • I’m connected with my family more at home because they’re right there in front of me but on the road, I sadly find it a challenge to even text or call and it’s always on the time that is best for me.

Do you see what I mean?

Then, over weeks, months, and years of doing things that relieve my stress and make my life on the road easier, I develop certain habits that help me get by, not get better.

And this is why the Six Energy Habits are vitally important.

They challenge us in six key areas to leverage the road and what it can do for us, not look at only the limits and what it can’t do for us.

On the road, it is so easy to overestimate the importance of one defining moment or massive change and underestimate the value of making small improvements on a daily basis.

Too often, we convince ourselves that massive success requires massive action. And as a result, we do nothing.

Improving 1 percent isn’t particularly notable – sometimes it isn’t even noticeable – but it can be far more meaningful in the long run.

Unfortunately the slow pace of transformation also make it easy to let a bad habit slide.

  • If you eat an unhealthy meal today, the scale doesn’t move much.
  • If you work late tonight and ignore your family they will forgive you.
  • If you procrastinate and put your project off until tomorrow, there will usually be time to finish later. A single decision is easy to dismiss.

But when we repeat 1 percent errors, day after day, by replicating poor decisions, duplicating tiny mistakes, and rationalizing little excuses, our small choices compound into toxic results. It’s the accumulation of many missteps – a 1 percent decline here and there – that eventually leads to a problem. Over the span of moments that make up a lifetime these choices determine the difference between who you are and who you could be.

“Success is the product of daily habits – not once-in-a-lifetime transformation.” – James Clear

What matters is whether your habits are putting you on the path toward success, and this is where most road warriors are wasting their years on the road.

They’re the most over-worked / stressed / burned-out / unhealthy / and disconnected they’ve EVER been in their lives.

I know because this was my Road Life for way too many years.

Time magnifies the margin between success and failure. It will multiply whatever you feed it. Good habits make time your ally. Bad habits make time your enemy.

I love this quote by James Clear: “Few things can have a more powerful impact on your life than improving your daily habits.”

So, how do you know if you’re stuck in a road rut and how do you get out of it?

Maybe you’re saying right now in your head, “I definitely need to change some of my road habits and I’m in a road rut – thank you Dr. Obvious”

But how do you make those changes?

The book Atomic Habits offer Four Laws of Behavior Change:

1. Make it obvious. Don’t hide your fruits in your fridge, put them on display front and center.
2. Make it attractive. Start with the fruit you like the most, so you’ll actually want to eat one when you see it.
3. Make it easy. Don’t create needless friction by focusing on fruits that are hard to peel. Bananas and apples are super easy to eat, for example.
4. Make it satisfying. If you like the fruit you picked, you’ll love eating it and feel healthier as a result!

Sometimes a habit will be hard to remember and you’ll need to make it obvious. Other times you won’t feel like starting and you’ll need to make it attractive. In many cases, you may find that a habit will be too difficult and you’ll need to make it easy. And sometimes, you won’t feel like sticking with it and you’ll need to make it satisfying.

This is how I applied what I learned about the four laws of behavior change:

I used the statement: When I do _______, Then I’ll do ____________.

After (CURRENT HABIT), I will (NEW HABIT).

This required me to think about what I wanted to do and when I’m going to do it.

One of the best ways to build a new habit is to identify a current habit you already do each day and then stack your new behavior on top ~ Habit Stacking

The key is to tie your desired behavior into something you already do each day. Once you have mastered this basic structure you can begin to create larger stacks by chaining small habits together. This allows you to take advantage of the natural momentum that comes from one behavior leading into the next.

Habit Stacking allows you to create a set of simple rules that guide your future behavior

Exercise Example: WHEN I see a set of stairs. THEN I will take them instead of using the elevator.

The secret to creating a successful habit stack is selecting the right cue to kick things off.

Habit Stacking works best when the cue is highly specific and immediately actionable.

The two most common CUES are time and location

Creating an Implementation Intention Strategy pairs a new habit with “I will (BEHAVIOR) at (TIME) in (LOCATION).”

With our bad habits, the immediate outcome usually feels good, but the ultimate outcome feels bad. With good habits, it is the reverse: the immediate outcome is unenjoyable but the ultimate outcome feels good.

“The cost of your good habits are in the present. The cost of your bad habits are in the future.”- James Clear

When the moment of decision arrives, instant gratification usually wins.

KEY: “The most effective form of motivation is progress”

The first mistake is never the one that ruins you. It is the spiral of repeated mistakes that follows. Once is an accident. Twice is the start of a new (bad) habit.

Anyone can have a bad performance, a bad workout, or a bad day at work. But when successful people fail, they rebound quickly. The breaking of a habit doesn’t matter if the reclaiming of it is fast.

Too often, we fall into an all-or-nothing cycle with our habits. The problem is not slipping up; the problem is thinking that if you can’t do something perfectly, then you shouldn’t do it at all.

You don’t realize how valuable it is to just show up on your bad (or busy) days.

KEY: Lost days hurt you more than successful days help you.

Sluggish days and bad workouts maintain the compound gains you accrued from previous good days. Simply doing something – ten squats, five sprints, a push-up, anything really – is huge. Don’t put up a zero. Don’t let losses eat into your compounding.

It’s not always about what happens during the workout. It’s about being the type of person who doesn’t miss workouts. It’s easy to train when you feel good, but it’s crucial to show up when you don’t feel like it – even if you do less than you hope.

Atomic Habits gives five ways get out of road rut

1. Start with an incredibly small habit.

“Make it so easy you can’t say no.” —Leo Babauta

When most people struggle to stick with a new habit, they say something like, “I just need more motivation.” Or, “I wish I had as much willpower as you do.”

This is the wrong approach. Research shows that willpower is like a muscle. It gets fatigued as you use it throughout the day. Another way to think of this is that your motivation ebbs and flows. It rises and falls.  Stanford professor BJ Fogg calls this the “motivation wave.”

Solve this problem by picking a new habit that is easy enough that you don’t need motivation to do it.
Rather than starting with 50 pushups per day, start with 5 pushups per day. Rather than trying to meditate for 10 minutes per day, start by meditating for one minute per day. Make it easy enough that you can get it done without motivation.

2. Increase your habit in very small ways.

“Success is a few simple disciplines, practiced every day; while failure is simply a few errors in judgment, repeated every day.”—Jim Rohn

One percent improvements add up surprisingly fast. So do one percent declines. Rather than trying to do something amazing from the beginning, start small and gradually improve. Along the way, your willpower and motivation will increase, which will make it easier to stick to your habit for good.

3. As you build up, break habits into chunks.

If you continue adding one percent each day, then you’ll find yourself increasing very quickly within two or three months. It is important to keep each habit reasonable, so that you can maintain momentum and make the behavior as easy as possible to accomplish.

Building up to 20 minutes of meditation? Split it into two segments of 10 minutes at first or four segments of five minutes
Trying to do 50 pushups per day? Five sets of 10 might be much easier as you make your way there.

4. When you slip, get back on track quickly.

“The best way to improve your self-control is to see how and why you lose control.”—Kelly McGonigal

Top performers make mistakes, commit errors, and get off track just like everyone else. The difference is that they get back on track as quickly as possible.

Research has shown that missing your habit once, no matter when it occurs, has no measurable impact on your long-term progress. Rather than trying to be perfect, abandon your all-or-nothing mentality.
You shouldn’t expect to fail, but you should plan for failure. Take some time to consider what will prevent your habit from happening. What are some things that are likely to get in your way? What are some daily emergencies that are likely to pull you off course? How can you plan to work around these issues? Or, at least, how you can bounce back quickly from them and get back on track?
You just need to be consistent, not perfect. Focus on building the identity of someone who never misses a habit twice.

5. Be patient. Stick to a pace you can sustain.

Learning to be patient is perhaps the most critical skill of all. You can make incredible progress if you are consistent and patient.

If you are adding weight in the gym, you should probably go slower than you think. If you are adding daily sales calls to your business strategy, you should probably start with fewer than you expect to handle. Patience is everything. Do things you can sustain. New habits should feel easy, especially in the beginning. If you stay consistent and continue increasing your habit it will get hard enough, fast enough. It always does.

I want you to define Two MAJOR Categories of your habits:

Keystone Habit – this is the game-changer habit. When you do this habit, everything else gets better.

Tombstone Habit – this is the game-killer habit. When you do this habit, everything else gets worse.

Let me give you personal examples:

My Keystone Habit is SLEEP – when I sleep and really protect and optimize my sleep, it dramatically affects the following:

  • I make better food choices
  • I workout more consistently and have better workouts
  • My Energy Hour in the morning of reading
  • I’m more motivated to connect with those back home

My Tombstone Habit is DRINKING – when I drink without strict boundaries, it dramatically affects the following to the bad:

  • I stay up later and the quality of my sleep is affected big time
  • I make lousy food choices – usually ends in something sweet and I always overdo it since I don’t eat sweets much anymore
  • I’m sluggish in the morning and my workouts always suffer

So, what is your Keystone Habit? What is your Tombstone Habit?

 

What’s the difference between the best athletes or top performers and everyone else? What do the really successful people do that most don’t? – beyond genetics, luck, and talent, they must be able to handle the boredom of training every day, doing the same things over and over.

Really successful people feel the same lack of motivation as everyone else. The difference is that they still find a way to show up despite the feelings of boredom.

Mastery requires practice but the more you practice something, the more boring and routine it becomes.

The greatest threat to success is not failure but boredom. We get bored with habits because they stop delighting us. The outcome becomes expected. And as our habits become ordinary, we start derailing our progress to seek novelty.

On your next trip or possibly the one you’re on right now, observe your road habits. Do you have more good habits than bad? Which of your habits can improve?

Your Road Habits will make or absolutely break you on becoming an Elite Road Warrior. The best performers have the best habits. They know their Keystone and their Tombstone Habits. And so do you.

Now, wherever you are on the road, do something, anything, just not nothing to master the business travel life.

10 Most Often Asked Questions Asked of Me About Road Life

One of my favorite parts of being a business travel performance expert is receiving so many questions whether through surveys, assessment, research projects, emails, or just plain conversation on a flight or at a hotel bar.

Recently, I spoke at a consulting firm and was flooded with GREAT questions from high-performing road warrior consultants who wanted to not get by on the road but get better and leverage the road to do it.

As a result, I’ve chosen ten of the most often asked questions for this article.

10 Most Often Asked Questions Asked of Me About Road Life

This 1st question is by far the most asked question but it’s also the one that gets the most pushback.

1 – How do you eat healthy on the road?

I failed miserably at this for easily the first half of my road career which has been too many years.

I viewed my business trip as a vacation when I ate, not a vocation. My filter was, “oh, that looks good!” I could spend more on an appetizer or dessert or glass of wine than I would on my entire meal with my own money.

The result? Ballooning to over 40 pounds overweight due to business travel. I hated how I looked in that blasted hotel mirror and felt lousy.

Then I came to the point where my perspective on food changed. I wanted energy on the road to be my best and Food is Fuel and Fuel is Energy.

I embraced four letters – MTHC (Make the Healthiest Choice)

And part of MTHC is three parts:
1. Continually Hydrate – I have an Elite Road Warrior water bottle and drink a ton of water ALL DAY LONG
2. Clean and Green – every meal is the cleanest I can eat and I add as many greens as I can
3. Carry a Controlled Substance – I carry a snack bag with Tupperware that has healthy snacks so I’m never caught off guard and always have an energy kick available

I have choices of what I put in my mouth and need to consciously choose how I feel after whatever I’m about to eat.

I favor hotels with full kitchens, shop at Whole Foods and/or Trader Joes whenever possible, and request eating someplace “Clean and Green” when going out with others.

I recently even did hard-core Keto30 on the road which you can listen to on episode 25 of the podcast.

Key phrase: MTHC (Make the Healthiest Choice)

2 – How do you workout on the road?

Time is your biggest enemy on the road.

I believed the lie “if I can’t get in a full workout, what’s the point?” – Lies, nothing but lies!

I had to change my mindset to “Something, Anything is Better Than Nothing.”

Sometimes my 20-minute workout is better than an hour.

Sometimes, going 10 minutes hard in my hotel room with bodyweight and resistance bands is more than enough.

“But I’m too tired to workout” – lies, nothing but lies.

Movement creates energy.

How many times have you worked out in the morning after dragging yourself out of bed and by the end of the workout, you were ready to conquer your day?! That’s me – every… single… time.

I learned the Increase M4X Formula
1. Stand More – think up on your feet, not down on your butt
2. Walk More – think forward, not still
3. Run More – think cardio, get your heart rate up
4. Lift More – think strength training

How I…

  • Stand More – stand at the gate / every 30 min on a flight / in meetings whenever possible / create stand up desks at the hotel (lobby or room)
  • Walk More – park at the back of a parking lot / choose a higher floor at the hotel / take the stairs instead of the elevator or escalator or walk the escalator
  • Run More – do HIIT that gets my heart rate up – jog to run / burpees / stairs quickly
  • Lift More – bodyweight / dumbbells / resistance bands

Key phrase: Something, Anything is Better Than Nothing

3 – How do you get a better night of sleep on the road?

Ah, sleep, the ultimate waste of time on the road, right? How can you get anything done if you’re in a coma?

I used to view sleep as a “necessary evil”

I had to learn to make the sleep I was getting, which was 6 hours or less, better before I started to add any more sleep because it wouldn’t be quality sleep.

1. Prioritize Bed Time
2. Create a Bed Time Ritual
3. Create an Ideal Sleep Environment

For me…

Bed Time Priority always depended on the type of my trip – was I by myself or with others? Was I doing training, speaking, and workshops, or at a conference or trade show? Once I knew, then I could realistically prioritize bedtime. That may mean leaving the event or bar earlier but nobody really cared the next morning. Regardless, getting to bed with the foresight of what time I needed to get up was a priority.

My Bed Time Ritual:

  • Drop the Lights
  • Drop the Temperature
  • Change the Room Scent
  • Comfy Clothes – under armor shorts / Hurley soft t-shirt or Dep Sleepwear
  • Read
  • Guided Meditation

Ideal Sleep Environment:

  • Cool
  • Dark and I mean dark – towel over door crack/clip to keep the curtains shut
  • Bose Sleep Buds

Key Phrase –“Improve Before Increase”

 

4 – What is your morning routine?

It has definitely evolved over time. In fact, I have an entire podcast episode on the First Hour of Your Road Day called the Energy Hour

My routine used to be checking social media, sports scores, texts, and emails while still in bed!

Once I opened up any of those, they owned my day and I rarely turned it around.

So, I needed to make sure I took care of ME first before everyone else’s agenda.

And what took care of me?

Four of the six energy habits:

1. Develop
2. Move
3. Connect
4. Fuel – continually hydrate

My exact morning routine:

  • Hydrate – my drink
  • Develop – read my Bible / read something inspirational / pray and meditate
  • Move – workout
  • Connect with the Fam – I want them to hear from me first thing in the morning and I’ll talk about how in Q5

Key Phrase – “Hit the Four Before the Door”

5 – How do you stay connected with those you love back home?

This was an area where I was what you call, a Check-In Guy for WAY too long.

I just “checked in” when it was convenient for me with no regard to what was going on back home in the life of my wife and kids. It was selfish to be honest as I look back on it.

Staying connected, especially if you’ve been traveling for any length of time, can, well, get old and stale. And for me, I wasn’t checking in enough and it really affected my family and friends back home.

Eventually, I leveraged my creative side to “spice things up” to re-connect with everyone to become a Connect-In Guy.

It’s done in three ways:

  • Connect Intentionally
  • Connect Thoughtfully
  • Connect Creatively – be memorable

How I Connect Now:

Key Phrase -“Be a Connect-In Guy or Girl, not a Check-in Guy or Girl”

The next five questions are more vulnerable.

I’ve not arrived as you’ll hear in the following answers. But I truly desire to transform my work, health, and home life on the road to master the business travel life.

 

6 – What took you the longest to change and why?

Learning how to rest and pace myself on the road. I’ve always been a hard-driver, Type-A, energy guy.

If you’ve not heard my back story, which you can listen to on the podcast in episode 002, I went so hard for so long, my body shut down to the point of complete exhaustion and I became very, very sick. It took months and months to recover and I had to learn to change my ways if I was going back to Road Life.

I had to prioritize three areas:

  • Sleep – improve then increase
  • Breaks – move the body, rest the mind
  • Downtime – time to be, not to be on

There was time for breaks and downtime – I just needed to take them and make them a priority – the payoff was beyond worth it.

I also had to learn to ask:

  • When is my energy the highest each day on the road?
  • Why is my energy low right now?
  • Is there anything I can do to change my energy level?
  • Can I match my energy with my tasks?

I had to become what I call an Energyologist (a Buckleyism) – the personal study of your own energy

Key Takeaway – You can have more energy on the road

 

7 – What do you regret the most on the road?

The answer is found in Energy Habit Six – Connect.

I regret not making my family a bigger priority especially when I first started traveling. I created some very bad habits in three areas:

  • How I left – abrupt and not sensitive especially to my kids’ feelings
  • When I was gone – When and how I contacted anyone back home revolved only around me and my schedule
  • How I returned – I was always exhausted when I came home and it was always about me. I demanded the house be in perfect condition and life revolved around me. I wanted to be left alone to “transition back into civilian life” yet I was angry when everyone went on with their lives.

My family hung in there but I had done some damage that took years to repair and I regret it. Thankfully I was able to turn it around and it’s become one of my strengths.

Learn from my costly mistakes.

Key Takeaway – Prioritize Others Just as Much

 

8 – What do I still struggle with on the road?

Drinking too often and too much.

I don’t get drunk on the road or take it too far. I learned very early in my career to never “be that guy” but only see or hear about “that guy”.

I love good wine and craft beer but have learned to minimize it big time especially doing Keto on the road.

I’m a Vodka Tonic guy and too easily justify a drink or three (always a double) after a long day, customer dinner, or event.

Doing Keto30 of absolutely no drinking was a very good thing for me along with not drinking on any weeknights when I’m home.

This is a struggle and growth area for me.

My biggest change has been adding one glass of water with every alcoholic drink. I call it the 1:1 Water Match Program – and it’s absolutely free to join

Key Takeaway – Make Sure You’re In Control

 

9 – How do you handle it when you blow it on the road?

I’ve adopted the James Clear concept called “Avoid the 2nd Mistake” – If I have a bad meal, I don’t justify the day or even the rest of the business trip.

If I don’t work out the 1st day, it’s not a free pass for the rest of the trip.

If you watch baseball, the best closers have the essence of short-term memory. If they blow last night’s game, they need to come back out the next night like it never happened and “begin again.”

Depending on what “blowing it” was for me, in the early days there was some regret and guilt. I had a couple of close friends I could tell “the real story” for some confession and accountability. I wanted to monitor the heart.

Another phrase I use that is helpful to me is “Dip NOT Dive” – when I go “off-road” as I call it from the 6 Energy Habits, I need this to be a quick dip and get right back to what allows me to master the business travel life and avoid the downward spiral and the 2nd mistake.

Learn from it and move on.

Key Takeaway – Avoid the 2nd Mistake

 

10- What advice would you give for a newer business traveler?

  • Learn and apply the Six Energy Habits immediately in your Road Career.
  • If you have bad habits at home, road life will only expose them.
  • Don’t worry about “what everyone else does or says”, you take care of yourself first and foremost.

Learn from my mistakes and others. You don’t have to do it the hard way with a brutal crashing and burning, 40 pounds overweight, burned out, stressed out, and disconnected from family and friends.

Key Takeaway – Own the Six Energy Habits right now!

 

I hope these questions and answers were helpful. They’ve been asked by a number of people, so here it was:
* The good
* The bad
* The ugly

I hope you gained some ideas and appreciated my honesty with the goal of helping you become an Elite Road Warrior.

If you want any more detail or further examples, you can find them in my book, ERW – 6EH to Master the Business Travel Life. It’s available on Amazon in the print version, Kindle digital version, and also on audiobook via Audible.

So, wherever you are on the road, do something, anything, just not nothing to master the business travel life. You Got This!

Eight Questions I Ask Every Morning on the Road

Do you know what most business travelers do when they wake up in the morning on the road in their hotel room?

First guess would be to hit snooze on the alarm and many do.

But Elite Road Warrior Group Research has shown that most business travelers…

Reach for their phone.

Why? Well, there’s a handful of reasons but no matter the reason there is always one thing in common:

It hijacks their morning.

Why? Because it’s a time sucker especially if we jump into checking the news or social media.

It’s also filled with OPAs – other people’s agenda.

  • What they want or need from you
  • What they want to tell you
  • What they want you to buy

Many lose a half hour or more and haven’t even climbed out of bed yet!

No condemnation here, road warrior.

I believed and justified in my head that if I could “just get ahead” by looking at my email, calendar, Slack or WeChat, etc. it would help me.

Lies nothing but lies!

I used to be so unintentional and reactive to whatever caught my attention or the path of least resistance in the morning on the road.

So I get it.

But here’s what I missed.

I missed the gift of the morning.

I missed the silence.
I missed the solitude.
I missed the chance to invest in me, the one thing nobody else can do for me.

And nobody else will guard unless I seize it.

And the morning is the perfect place for it especially if I’ve had a good night of rest.

Let me state upfront – right now, my 1st hour in the morning on the road is filled only with energy habits.

The two largest of my morning energy habits are:

  1. MOVE – Increase M4X – stand more / walk more / run more / lift more
  2. DEVELOP – Sharpen the Mind / Process the Thoughts / Monitor the Heart

And my motto is two phrases which you may have heard me say over and over:

  • Consistency Over Length
  • Something, Anything, is Better Than Nothing

Many ask how I spend my mornings on the road and that’s the crux of this episode.

But before we get to that, let me tell you two things I do immediately.

  1. Hydrate – (Fuel – Continually Hydrate) with 16 oz water, lemon, sea salt, and greens powder
  2. Read – (Sharpen the Mind and Process the Thoughts) – Bible/something inspirational (if it’s the day of a flight, I save this reading for the 1st 20-30 minutes of the flight which you’ll learn in the podcast episode Seven Things I Do on Every Single Flight)

Once those two habits are done, I move on to my Elite Road Warrior Journal. It has two portions:

  1. Think Space (Process the Thoughts) dotted page Notebook
  2. Eight Questions Journal (Monitory the Heart) blank page Notebook

Here are some initial questions people ask about my personal process:

1.How long do you take to journal your questions?

    • 5-15 minutes

2. Where do you journal?

    • Most of the time in my hotel room at a desk but sometimes if my hotel is near a park, forest, a body of water, etc., I’ll choose there.

One time I climbed Mount Spokane and journaled there – talk about silent/solitude / and inspiring!

3. What do you write with?

I use different colors for different reasons when I write for both my Monitor the Heart journal and Think Space journal

4. What do you write in?

    • Elite Road Warrior Branded Journal

5. What does your layout look like?

    • Top Left – location
    • Top Right – date (for example: M.10.10.19)

I use two pages of my journal so there’s a lot of free space.

 

Before we get into the Eight Questions I Answer Every Morning on the Road, let’s talk about WHY I do it. The road has the ability to suck out any empathy, compassion, generosity, etc. within a person and especially men.

I found that too often I was coming home jaded and it was affecting my wife and kids. I was bringing home the stress of the road from the long hours to the draining people I encountered and my family and friends didn’t really care for “that Bry” or “that guy” if you will.

I didn’t grow up journaling. I didn’t have examples of people around me journaling. Notetakers, yes, but not journalers and there’s a difference.

I viewed journaling as a girly diary-thing, and therefore not for me.

And when I eventually tried it after prompting from a mentor, I sucked at it. I was SO inconsistent. Huge entry one day then days and weeks would pass with radio silence and major gaps.

Then my perfectionism would come out because if I journal, I wanted to do it “just right.”

Way…Too…Much…Pressure.

And I quit.

A few years ago Scott Mawdesley, our lead SME for Develop, really challenged me that it’s more important THAT I write, not what I write and I should try journaling “just one line” per entry.

I could write more but Write One Line became my mantra.

And you know what? It worked.

Then another mentor of mine, Jonathan Milligan, encouraged me with key questions he asked himself every morning to give structure to his journaling and encouraged me to do the same – hence the Eight Questions I Answer Every Morning on the Road.

But WHY do I journal these questions and what comes as a result?

1. Clarity – What do I want out of my life
2. Themes – What’s happening on a consistent basis in my life – what are the patterns I wouldn’t normally see without reflecting
3. Focus – where should I spend my time

Eight Questions I Answer Every Morning on the Road

I have three simple categories for my questions:

  • Review Yesterday – 3 questions
  • Reflect Now – 2 questions
  • Rehearse Today – 3 questions

 

REVIEW YESTERDAY

1.  What Happened Yesterday?

I want to be able to track my time so I know what my day looked like. I want to be able to remember that specific day at a glance.

I want to know:

  • Was I productive?
  • Was there margin in my day and where?
  • Did the six energy habits exist?

This is GREAT intel at the end of my month and the end of my quarter when I review my journal to see how I spent my time

2. What Were My Biggest Wins?

These are some answers of what I actually accomplished.

Some days my response is “busy but not productive” – I detest these days on the road.

I want to see forward motion on my goals for the week and the day to day big wins give me that intel.

3. What Were My Lessons Learned?

This may come from what I read or listened to the past day. It may be from my big wins or lack thereof.

It’s how I’m doing and what I’m learning in regards to the three focus areas of Elite Road Warrior: Work/Health/Home Life.

This is feedback on if and how I’m growing on a DAILY basis – is there a theme?

This 3rd question challenges me and sometimes it takes me a minute or two to think of something if the answer is not top of mind.

Note: sometimes I may need to move on to another question and come back to it but I always want to answer this key question.

REFLECT NOW

4. Who/What Am I Thankful For RIGHT NOW?

This is the GRATITUDE CHECK
Learn to ask: “Who or what am I grateful for right now?”

I have to be honest, some days it’s easy to mail it in and put something generic but that’s not the goal.

It’s The Who and/or the What but also the WHY – why am I thankful for that person or situation?

I’ve learned through the years people I’m grateful for actually don’t know I’m grateful for them UNLESS I TELL THEM!

This is a GREAT chance to prompt you to take action RIGHT THEN to let them know – send them a text/email, or leave a voicemail.

Sometimes I actually take a picture of that answer in my journal and send it to them.

You’d be shocked how much this little gesture means to people especially people who you care about and are thankful for.

If I’m struggling to answer this question on a consistent basis, this is a heart issue on my part that needs attention.

5. How Am I Feeling Right Now?

This is the PULSE CHECK
Learn to ask: “How am I REALLY doing?”
I know what you guys are thinking: here’s the diary “touchy/feely” part of the program.

And you’re right – suck it up and try it.

I’m not asking for you to write paragraphs and have a Kleenex available.

Mine are short bullets.

For example:

  • Exhausted from…
  • Better rested because…
  • Proud of…
  • Disappointed in…
  • Frustrated by…
  • Missing home right now…
  • Motivated to…

Nothing earth-shattering but I want a pulse on how I’m really doing.

Am I seeing patterns of day-after-day-after-day of being frustrated or tired?

This question is not nearly as hard as you think especially if you do it bullet style and lead with a key emotion word: proud, disappointed, tired, motivated, etc.

Three “Rehearse the Day” questions. Why rehearse the day? It’s like an athlete playing their game in their mind.

Too often we just let the Road Day happen to us.

We’re not intentional and then we wonder why our road day gets hijacked and we’re ALWAYS up until midnight working.

REHEARSE TODAY

6. What Are My Big 3 Today?

This is a concept from Michael Hyatt in his Full Focus Planner.

The Daily Big 3 are designed to come from the Weekly Big 3 which come from your Quarterly Big 3.

I set quarterly goals in business but also in life so my weekly Big 3 should influence your daily big 3.

If I have a heavy travel day, these are key.

What do I want to get done on my 4-hour flight?

If I have a heavy meeting or event day, maybe my Big 3 need to happen 1st thing in the morning.

Pro Tip: almost every single business travel day one of my Big 3 is energy habit six: CONNECT – I want to make my family a high priority within my day which means I need to schedule it.

7. What is Today’s Highlight?

I learned this one from the book, Make Time.

The authors have three ways to determine your day’s highlight:

  • Something URGENT that must get done today and will be a huge relief if and when it is done
  • Something SATISFYING that will make you feel pleased and proud it’s completed
  • Something that brings you JOY – what you look forward to = mine is usually my downtime activity

And the last of the 8 questions and final of the Rehearse Today questions

8. How/What Would Make Today Great?

I credit this question to Jonathan Milligan, my mentor and friend, who challenged me to answer this question each day.

And it was a challenge but now I depend on this last question.

Alan Stein, Jr. in his book, Raise Your Game, states there are only two things in life you have control over:

  • Your attitude
  • Your effort

And oftentimes my response is one of those that deal with the six energy habits

I want and I need to make each day on the road GREAT.

I want to be at my best and no longer just get by but leverage each day on the road to get better.

 

I answer these eight questions on the road every morning but also at home.

Did you catch that? Both on the road but also at home now. This is not ONLY a Road Thing.

Action Items

1. Just start – write one line for each question, and maybe you have your own questions.

2. Order the Elite Road Warrior Branded Journal – enjoy what you journal in. For me, I love the leather – the look and the feel. I love the paper in the journal. I love the pens I write with and the leather case they’re kept in. This makes a HUGE difference when it comes time to write. I’m also proud to carry it around.

 

 

 

Seven Things I Do On Every Flight

This article is brought to you by the book, Beyond Travel by Marcey Rader. An absolute must-read for a business traveler from my mentor and now friend.

 

Most business travelers have one thing in common and that is they’re on an airplane. But how they use their time on the flight is where things change.

How we use our time is a very personal thing. Not convinced? Tell someone they’re not using their time wisely and just wait for THAT response.

I suggest stepping back or getting ready for the inner defense attorney in them to come pouring out.

And since I’m a student of road warriors as a business travel performance expert, I’m always watching, listening, and learning how they spend their time.

One of the best labs for this observation is the airplane, imagine that.

You can tell who is on the plane for business travel and who is there for leisure.

The ones that stand out as the business traveler use their time doing three primary things:
1. To Work
2. To Watch Something
3. To Sleep

They sleep because they’re exhausted before they even land at their destination on the very 1st day of the trip, We know how THAT story goes, and it’s not the ideal way to start your Anchor Day.

I’m often either asked how I spend my time on a plane and/or those around me comment on my use of time on the flight.

Let me give you a money PRO TIP this early in the article.

Create Your Flight Plan.

A pilot has a flight plan and so should you. Both take you from one place to the other.

This is the exact opposite of most road warriors.

Again, what do they do?

Work
Watch Something
Sleep

Some multi-task and are somehow able to do all three at the same time… but do none of them well.

Have you seen that guy or girl? Is that you?

If it’s an early flight, they’re knocked out before the flight even takes off.

When they awaken from their coma nap with award mocking, I mean marvelous hair, they crack open their laptop and randomly go at it.

Then they get bored and start to watch something.

That’s more of a Flight “C’mon Man” than a Flight Plan.

And I’ve found there are four arguments with business travelers on whose time it really is on a flight:

  1. The company time – no matter what time you’re on a flight (I’ve worked for companies like that and despised it by the way)
  2. The company’s time during normal business hours (and is there such a thing on the road?)
  3. The company and your time as long as you get your work done
  4. YOUR time and only your time unless you choose to use YOUR time for work – after all, business and personal hours are easily blurred on the road

No matter where you stand on the four arguments, the point is you need a plan and I propose…

The Elite Road Warrior Flight Plan which has the following three elements:

  1. What you’re going to do
  2. The order you’re going to do it
  3. Approximate times

The moral of the story here, Road Warriors, is whatever you do, you do on purpose.

If you work, you know…

  1. What you’re going to do
  2. The order you’re going to do it
  3. Approximate times

If it’s a blend (between work and your time), you know…

  1. What you’re going to do
  2. The order you’re going to do it
  3. Approximate times

If it’s only your time…

  1. What you’re going to do
  2. The order you’re going to do it
  3. Approximate times

Why is this so important? Because how we use our time is how we spend our lives, and this includes a flight especially if you fly a ton as I do.

Elite road warriors use their time wisely in their Work, their Health, and their Home Life, the three focus areas.

And it starts with one of my favorite locations to do Focus Work.

  • It’s where the phone doesn’t ring.
  • Someone can’t swing by my office.
  • I can choose to be online or offline.

The following things everyone can do on every single flight no matter if it’s an hour, across the country, or across the ocean.

What changes? The length and frequency.

The longer the flight, the longer each of the following may occur and just how often I choose to do them.

The important point here is what they are.

And remember, our Flight Plan exists of:

  1.  What you’re going to do
  2.  The order you’re going to do it
  3. Approximate times

It’s asking this very critical question:

Where Do I Want This Time to Take Me in the End?

When you land, how did you use your time?

Here are Seven Things I Do On Every Flight

1. Read / Listen

The 1st thing I do every single time is read/listen to a book.

Why first?

Personally, I just can’t get any work done because of all the interruptions of people boarding the plane, getting by me since I prefer the aisle to get up to stand, stretch, and walk.

So, through the years I’ve learned that if I don’t read first thing, I rarely get to it later on, but that’s just me.

I find it also calms my mind and puts me in a place of personal or professional development which is energy habit #5.

Prioritize the important not urgent first.

To be clear, my reading time is boarding time after I find my seat and get situated until once I reach 10K feet. My goal is to have read/listen time.

This part of the flight will always happen: I have to find my seat, everyone else has to find theirs, and they will announce when we hit 10K feet. So, leverage this predictable time to get your read/listen to on.

Challenge: If you’ve not read the Elite Road Warrior book, I challenge you to get it, and dedicate this boarding to 10K time to read the book.

2. Drink Water

Most people avoid water on the plane for a couple of reasons:
1. They say they don’t want to have to get up to go to the bathroom but then will have two cokes or an adult beverage or three.
2. They just don’t drink water normally when they’re on the ground and it’s just not part of their Road Routine.

The reality is you should double your amount of water on the plane. Huh? Why?
When you are on a plane, you’re basically flying in a sky desert, according to Life Hacker, where the humidity hovers around 10- 20%, which is less than the Sahara Desert, crazy enough.
This is due to the plane’s air circulation, or lack thereof.
Compare that to normal humidity, which is between 30-60%, and it’s no wonder you’re more dehydrated on a plane, which is why you often feel a little more fatigued, have headaches, and nausea when flying.
On a plane, if you were to bring a soaking wet washcloth onto the plane, within 90 minutes, it will be completely dry!
According to Dr. Peter Hackett, the director of the Institute for Altitude Medicine, you should drink about 8 ounces of water for every hour you’re in the air. So just plan on drinking twice as much water on a plane when you’re flying.
The last thing I do before boarding the plane is head to the bathroom and try to go (I hear my father say, “Son, just push and try anyway!”), then I fill up my water bottle. It’s the times when I don’t and rely on drink service that we hit turbulence for six hours on a two-hour flight and the flight attendant can’t get up – or can they? Hmm.
And did you know every airline has at least this one thing in common? Free Refills on water.

So, I chug water often and let it do its magic.

Challenge: Drink about 8 ounces of water for every hour you’re in the air.

3. Think Space

What is Think Space? Taking time to think and put your thoughts on paper.

It’s the key element of Process the Thoughts which is the 2nd part of the Invest in You Formula of energy habit 5: Develop.

Why take time for Think Space?

Personally, my brain is always and I mean always going. I need time to get what’s in there, out of there.

I’ve always been good at the 1st part of the Invest in You Formula of Sharpening the Mind by putting things in but not getting things out. Hence the need for Think Space.

What do I use?

The Elite Road Warrior Journal which has two sections: one for Think Space and one for Monitor the Heart (journaling)

How long do I take? Depends on the flight but anywhere from 5 to 30 minutes.

What do I think about?

You name it.

Sometimes it’s just free form. I just open it up and go wherever my mind takes me. And since it’s scary in there, what I think or write about may be all over the place.

But usually 5 minutes or so into Think Space, my mind starts to settle and I think about something specific and process it.

Ideas:

  • Your trip
  • Follow-up
  • Your goals
  • How to connect with family/friends

The point here is leveraging the peace and quiet in the air and creating time to think.

I have a blog post about Think Space along with an entire chapter in the Elite Road Warrior book for more details, examples, etc.

Challenge: plan just 5 minutes to do nothing but think on your next flight and write it down, preferably in the Elite Road Warrior branded journal – just sayin

4. Stand and Stretch

Believe it or not, you’re actually almost completely at the mercy of the seat belt light or everyone else’s sedentary behavior. 30-60 seconds to stand and stretch makes a huge difference every 30 minutes.

Why? Your body gets tight especially the older you are. And your mind gets tired.

I define a break as Move the Body and Rest the Mind. And a break can be a micro-break of 30-60 seconds. Perfect time to stand and stretch.

If you don’t stand and stretch consistently, you’ll be surprised quickly by just how much this one act will do for you on a flight to go back and do whatever you’re doing.

Challenge: commit to take just one stand and stretch break during your next flight

5. Work

This one goes back to the four arguments of whose time is it really on a flight.

If and when I work, I try to leverage this unique time:

  • No phone calls
  • No work chat or texts
  • No stop by your office to chat
  • No WiFi if you want to – if I want to be officially “off the grid”, I can be and ain’t nobody can do anything about it

My guidelines for working on a plane:

  • Have Rules – how long
  • Have a Plan – high leverage tasks
  • Have focus

This can be Deep Work time. If you abide by the guidelines, you can knock out this Time Block of focused, deep work time to make some serious progress.

6. Walk

Every hour or more I get up and am free to move about the cabin as they say.

My water kicks in and it’s go time and I mean literally. It’s a great reminder to stand, stretch, and walk.

I always choose the bathroom in the furthest direction. Why? Get more walking and potentially stand and stretch time if I have to wait.

Again, going back to the definition of a break. Move the Body and Rest the Mind, a walk no matter where you walk is a great catalyst to do both and then come back even more refreshed to get back to the task at hand.

Challenge: commit and take at least one stroll down the aisle during your next flight (if you did #2, drink water, this may just be your trigger reminder)

7. Meditate

Once we’re about to land and the cabin is getting cleaned/ seat trays in their full and upright position, I use this time as a trigger to meditate.

I don’t get down in a lotus position and make a scene to go Zen on everyone. But I do take a few moments to meditate after I put all my gear away.

Why? Get in the right headspace.

I want to get where I’m going prepared, focused, and in the right state of mind.

And this is done by mindfulness.

You can hear more about it on the Elite Road Warrior Podcast episode #27 on why meditation didn’t work for me on the road… (which is a hook title, FYI) so I’m a big believer in the benefits of taking time on a flight to meditate and get my head in the right place.

Because, at least for me, once that plane lands and I stand, it’s go time. To work or head home. Either way, I want to be mindful.

Challenge: take just one minute to try and meditate once your flight begins to descend to become mindful of what’s next after the flight

Honorable Mentions – let me give you three

  1. Watch Something

The default and in the top two tasks most do on a plane.

If and when I watch something, this is my time to binge-watch something. Breaking Bad was my show and now it’s Bosch from Amazon Prime.

Sometimes, especially on a late flight on the way home, it’s nice to zone out to a show or a movie.

There’s nothing wrong with it but to me, it’s a reward once I get my Flight Plan high leveraged tasks complete.

2.   Talk To Your Neighbor

The irony here is one of the unwritten rules of a business traveler on a flight is applying the DND international symbol – putting on the Do Not Disturb headphones then not making contact.

But sometimes it’s nice to talk to someone – you never know where it could lead. My last keynote came from someone I sat next to on a flight!

3.     Develop

Learn something beyond a book/audiobook.

Lastly, I want to prove to you the power of a Flight Plan in action with focused work.

The Elite Road Warrior book was written over a nine-month period of time by committing to this very plan of the seven things I do on every flight. I prepared myself by reading, drinking water, and standing/stretching/walking to stay sharp to write flight after flight after flight.

This can be done Road Warriors and if you’ve read or listened to my book, you’ve benefited from it too!

So, wherever you are on the road, do something, anything, just not nothing to master the business travel life.

Go and get your Flight Plan on today.

You Got This!

References

7 Early Warning Signs for Companies to Avoid Business Travel Burnout:

 Top Ten Business Travel Hacks Guide:

 

How the “Invest in You”​ Formula Can Change Your Life

Taking time for personal and/or professional development is a lost art and one of the last priorities for most people.

One of my favorite quotes is by an author, Dale Partridge who was quoting his friend and said, “If you’re not willing to learn, no one can help you. If you’re determined to learn, no one can stop you.”

This means investing in yourself to get better.

It requires the following from you:

  • Your Time – you need to carve out a period of time to invest in you and you alone
  • Your Focus – you need to be in the learning zone (aka locked in / dialed in / no distractions)
  • Your Commitment – you need to be consistent

Most are simply not willing to make those requirements a habit but it’s possible whether you’re on the road or at home.

The formula for the Develop Energy Habit is: Invest in You. There are three parts to the formula with a natural and necessary flow.

How the “Invest in You” Formula Can Change Your Life

The 1st part is to Sharpen the Mind.

Key Phrase: “Think Putting Good Content In”

Too many of us “put content in” but the keyword in the phrase is “good” which means content that helps you develop personally and/or professionally.

The normal content is email, text, news, social media feeds, etc.

In this energy habit, that content doesn’t count. We want good content that helps you develop personally and/or professionally.

So, let’s break down the 1st part of the Invest in You Formula of Sharpen the Mind.

There are three keys to Sharpen the Mind:

Find the What

What content do you want to consume that will help you grow as a person that sharpens your mind?

  • Find something you enjoy – this is something you look forward to reading
  • Find something you want to learn – this is something you could implement right away

This is next level, road kiddos. It could be for your job/career or to develop a new skill. The topics are endless, and this is where most business professionals wonder why they’re still stuck in their job. Remember, most people only read what is required of them instead of reading to get ahead.

Find the Where

Where do you find book ideas?

  • On this blog, I mention many book titles, including my own, Elite Road Warrior
  • Amazon – just do a search. There are so many books available
  • Audible – maybe you like to listen to books. This is a great option to receive the content while you’re driving, or busy doing dishes.
  • Barnes & Noble – Once stores start opening up, this is a great option. When you have downtime and can search the shelves for a title that is something you enjoy or has something you can learn.

Find the When

Having the place doesn’t help, if there’s no time to read. Having a quiet place where I won’t be interrupted, where I can sharpen my mind without distractions is key.

I implement reading into my time blocks – first thing in the morning, I make reading part of my morning routine. I read my Bible and my current motivational book.

Right after dinner can be another good time whereas a family we have individual time where I can do some great reading.

The 2nd part of the “Invest in You” Formula is to Process the Thoughts.

Key Phrase: “Think Getting the Content Out”

Here’s a paradox for you: the faster and busier things get, the more we need to build thinking time into our schedule. The noisier things get, the more we need to build quiet reflection spaces into our day, where we can truly focus.

No matter how busy you think you are, you can carve time and space to think. Jeff Weiner, the CEO of LinkedIn, schedules up to two hours of blank space on his calendar every day. He divides them into thirty-minute increments where he schedules nothing. It is a simple practice he developed when back-to-back meetings left him with little time to process what was going on around him.

At first, it felt like an indulgence and a waste of time. But eventually, he found it to be his single-most valuable productivity tool. He sees it as the primary way he can ensure he is in charge of his day, instead of being at the mercy of it.

Creating Think Space is a new concept for most people so let me define the concept:

Think Space is a dedicated time to develop and process key ideas.

Another way of looking at Think Space is as an “idea formulator.”

There are many ways to maximize Think Space:

  • PREPARE for Think Space

This sounds obvious but getting into the “thinking zone” has some prerequisites.

I’ve wasted more time during my Think Space because I was simply unprepared in two key areas:

  1. Concepts to think through – I now have the time and couldn’t think of what I wanted to spend this time on, and I need a dedicated period of time to process.
  2. Means of recording it – If and when an idea would come, I had nowhere to record it and had to leave it to my memory. Guess where THAT idea ended up!

These are solvable issues when you prepare in advance. When I know I’m going somewhere that I’m going to have to wait, I always plan ahead and bring a journal and/or clipboard, blank paper, and a few fine-tipped colored pens. (So… I’m a creative type who likes old school pen and paper but specifically different colors and blank white paper). I then label my Think Space topic at the top of the page.

  • Create the Right Environment for Think Space

You know what distracts you, so do what you need to do to make the most of this time. This is absolutely key. You want to keep your mind in the thinking zone, so definitely remove email, text, and phone alerts.

You also know when the environment is advantageous for thinking. Do you need quiet? Music? Headphones to either knock out the sound or for a certain type of music?

 

What to Think About During Think Space

So, you’re all prepared and it’s actually go-time to process. If you don’t have a clue already on how you could spend the time, here are some ideas:

Professional

  • Preparation – What do you need to develop or review for any upcoming meetings/presentations, etc.?
  • Follow-up – Who do you need to follow-up with as a result of your business travel?
  • Deliverables – What did you promise that you need to take action on to be a person of your word?

Personal

  • Goals – What do you want to accomplish in the next 90 days? What are your yearly goals? Do you want to write a book? Run a 10K?
  • Big Decisions – Do you move? Do you take the job offer? Should you change careers?
  • Your Future (looking forward) – What changes do you want to make in your life?
  • Evaluation (looking backward) – Did you accomplish your goals? How did your presentation go? Workouts?

Think about what to think about. As odd as that sounds, use Think Space as a roadmap to formulate the thoughts you want to develop. You will be surprised at the results if you take the time. Then, write your ideas down to think about for a future Think Space session.

 

Find a centralized place to keep your notes from your Think Space session.

There is nothing worse than finally having a great idea but losing it. You may have even written it down, but now you cannot find it. Talk about maddening! Learn to keep all your Think Space results in a centralized location for easy access.

 

The 3rd and last part of the Invest in You Formula is to Monitor the Heart.

Key Phrase: “Think Checking In on You”

As road warriors, we know the check-in process and often it’s a huge sign of relief to finally show up at the hotel after travel or a long day on the road, and we’re relieved when we finally get to check-in.

Same idea, but to Monitor the Heart means taking time to check in with what’s going on inside of you.

Guys struggle with heart stuff – we think it’s too “touchy-feely” and the women have us beat hands down in this area but also scare us off so we don’t even touch it.

But gents, that has to change. Let me help a brother out on this one.

 

How Do You Monitor The Heart?

We need to learn to check the vitals consistently. Here are some vital checks you need to do:

  1. Pulse Check

Learn to ask: “How am I REALLY doing?”

We ask people all the time, “How are you doing?” We don’t really care or even want them to answer beyond fine or great. My father used to have a drop-dead line when someone asked that question. Here’s how it went:

Acquaintance: “How are you doing?”

My father: “Depends”

Acquaintance: (Confused and stops in their tracks.) “Depends on what?”

My father: “How much time you have. If you only have a second, I’m fine. If you have a minute or two, I’ll actually tell you how I’m doing.”

That interaction was always awkward to me as a kid, but wow, do I understand it now. On the road, we would change the word “fine” to “busy” to compete with each other on who is busier (aka who’s more important!).

A pulse check asks YOU “How are you REALLY doing?” A pulse check is quick but important.

Try answering this question daily. It may take a while to get how you’re REALLY doing out in the open, but that’s the goal.

2.  Gratitude Check

Learn to ask: “Who or what am I grateful for right now?”

We all want to be grateful people, but are we? How often do we acknowledge our gratitude? This is a discipline that can change how you view your life once you put it into consistent practice.

I began this practice years ago with a gratitude journal that caused me to reflect and ask this gratitude question: Who or what am I grateful for right now? I have to admit, it was harder than I thought. It’s easy to be quick, shallow, and answer with one-word responses, like my teenage sons. I’m asking you to think of only one per day to start.

Two Key Details:

  • Write It Down – There is power in writing words down; it also allows you to go back later and read what you’ve written.
  • Be Specific – Once you list the who or what, write down why you’re grateful.

3.   Soul Check

Learn to ask: “What do I need to get out that I’m keeping in?

There are issues, feelings, frustrations, anger, hurts, disappointments, and on and on that we continue to swallow and never let see the light of day. Some of them are literally killing us. The stress they’re putting on our hearts is like the fluid crushing my mother’s physical heart. Both are doing damage, just in a different way. The heart is where you find yourself.

Have you ever been around a person who doesn’t have a filter and just starts dumping poison? I find this guy all too often on the road. This dude has some serious heart issues.

I’ve found that morning journaling has been the best source for me to monitor the heart process. I ask a series of questions daily to monitor my own heart.

I want to be around people who have a heart that is sensitive to those around them. I’m drawn to them and compelled to become more like them in this way. They raise the bar and are not dependent upon others to make decisions for them. I’m around enough Donny and Debbie Downers on the road who’ve lived for years on Denial Street.

The best and most helpful action is to talk to someone about what’s going on at a soul level in your heart. Most of us need to figure out what’s going on in there first, and you can do that by learning to ask, “What do I need to get out that I’m keeping in?” then bring it to a trusted friend or counselor.

Let me start you off by asking how your heart is toward your…

  • Spouse/significant other
  • Kids
  • Friends
  • WORK – boss/co-workers/clients/your role
  • What you care about in life/what matters to you (causes/faith)

1. Do the pulse check. Ask and answer, “How am I really doing?”

2. Do the gratitude check. Ask and answer, “Who or what am I grateful for right now?”

3. Do the soul check. Ask and answer, “What do I need to get out that I’m keeping in?”

The Elite Road Warrior Journal is a beautiful black, artisan branded journal that has two sections: one for Think Space and one for Road Life to monitor the heart. You should try it out yourself!

Your action items this week may be:

  • Finding something to read to develop you personally or professionally
  • Taking time for Think Space
  • Purchasing the Elite Road Warrior Journal at our online store
  • Journaling key questions each day to truly check in with yourself

The energy habit of DEVELOP takes time and commitment but separates the men from the boys and the women from the girls.

And there’s no better time than now to begin personal and professional development being at home to prepare you for the road.

Get your read and think time on man!